Telling Parents (Part Two (2)
Now your engaged. Congratulations! Time to tell the parents. Fun! You might be feeling many things. Excitement, Sadness, and some reservations if they don't know you have been dating that special someone.
If you read the first part of this blog then you problably have an idea of what you will be sepending. That mean's you and your fiance have decided a few of the basics. What type of wedding.
The first thing mom and other woman will do is ask to see the engagement ring. Maybe you decided to only have a wedding ban, that's also acceptable. You might feel the disappointment and judgement, lets agree that to human is to have emotions towards the person. Not always our best side shows. The best thing to do is smile and not say a word until they ask a question. The reality is that is a personal choice.
Now, after the emotion of it all. It's time to briefly ask questions back.
Bring out the computer. Don't be afraid to ask the difficult questions.
Begin with can we discuss a few details?
Let me show you what our budget looks like. This will show your parents how mature both of you are taking the relationship and that it is serious.
His contribution to the wedding.
Your contribution to the wedding.
The breakdown of what you will be spending.
The total amount you have.
Which will bring you to the amount you need.
There is the ask.. Would you like to contribute to our wedding cost? That breaksdown the tradition of the bride spend this the groom spends this amount.
Your parents may ask. What else do we have to pay for? Explain they don't have to pay for anything. It is a choice and a you are an adult. You have made the choice to get married you will find a way to pay for the wedding of choice. However, if they would like to support you in the decision the the following is the tradiational way that ediquette calls for.
Bride's family pays for:
Engagement party (optional)
Wedding invitations and other stationery (announcements, thank-you notes, etc.)
Services of bridal consultant
Wedding gown and accessories
Flowers for ceremony and reception sites
Bouquets for bridesmaids
Bridal party transportation to ceremony and reception
Family's wedding attire
Bride pays for:
The groom's ring
The bridesmaids' luncheon
Gifts for the bridesmaids
Wedding gift for the groom
Attendants pay for:
Bachelor and bachelorette parties
Gifts for the bride and groom (can purchase individual gifts or chip in on a group gift)
Wedding attire and accessories
Transportation to and from wedding town or city
Groom's family pays for:
Engagement party (optional)
Their own wedding attire
Groom pays for:
The bride's rings
The marriage license
Personal flowers: the bride's bouquet, boutonnieres for wedding party, corsages for mothers and grandmothers
Gifts for the groomsmen
Wedding gift for the bride
Gifts for parents
Transportation to the honeymoon
Remember.....this is not a Have Too! It's a Want To!